Cast of Characters

…being a reasonably representative list of people featured in The Book, listed from A-Z by forename and described in useful haiku aide-mémoire form…

Adam Kay
Singing, swearing doc / sang ‘London Underground song‘ / At our launch party

Alex Tew
Million Dollar kid /And beat boxing champion / I owe him some shoes

Angus Bankes
Moreover founder / And Kudocities Chairman / Quite a busy man

Anthony Cheetham
Orion founder / Publishing entrepreneur /  TFP backer

Barry Diller
Media mogul /  But to me he’ll always be / Mr QVC

Belle de Jour
A Blogging call girl/  Probably doesn’t look much / Like Billie Piper

Benjamin Cohen
Teenage thousandaire / Turned humble correspondent / Watchword: modesty

Brad Greenspan
From eUniverse / Became a MySpace founder / Tom is not his friend

Chad Hurley
YouTube co-founder / Breeds sickening jealousy / Jammy fucking git

Chris DeWolfe
MySpace co-founder / Means literally, ‘Chris The Wolf’ / A little known fact

Clare Christian
TFT MD / Now part of Harper Collins / See Murdoch, below

Dan Bower
Chief Technical Man / Views of ‘Local’ are unknown / Suspect he loves it

Danielle Gusmaroli
Woodward and Bernstein / If they were one person and / A fucking moron

Danni Ashe
Porn entrepreneur / Inadvertent brand foiler / With monitized rack

Danny Rimer
King of geek VCs / Lucky I don’t need money / After book comes out

David and Victoria Beckham
Squeaky-voiced ball gonk / Silent clothes horse from Spice Girls / Match made in heaven

David Cameron
Leader of Tories / A little too fucking smug / For some people’s tastes

David Filo
Yahoo! co-founder / Named after type of pastry / Very rich pastry

Dr Suman Biswas
An anesthetist / Adam Kay’s singing partner / Quite a mixed CV

Emily Dubberley
Vocal chords / Smoothed by a thousand blow jobs / Throws filthy parties

Eric Schmidt
Google CEO / Chief Executive Spoilsport / Is more accurate

Ernest Hemingway
A good example / Of a famous rum drinker / Just saying, Jason

Ernst Malmsten
Managed to blow through / More cash than the KLF / In a shorter time

George Berkowski
Founder of Woo Me / Wouldn’t bet on Facebook price / But did anyway

Heather Smith
TFT employee one / Nicest person in the world / Saved our arses lots

Hunter S. Thompson
Another rum fan / Wrote a diary about it / Need more examples?

Ian Hislop
The ‘Eye’ editor / Old skool master of revenge / Learned my lesson *gooood*

James Lark
Multi-talented / Author, actor, singer and / Sometime scarf wearer

James ‘Jamie’ Minter
Mr. Adam Street / Responsible for the best / London members bar

Jamie Murray Wells
Friend of the Royals / And scourge of optometrists / An odd mix, all told

Janine Gibson
Responsible for / Editing my Graun column / Patience of a saint

Janus Friis
Co-founder of Skype / And peer to peer pioneer / An all-round great Dane

Jason McCabe Calacanis
Weblogger made good / Has given his dogs surnames / All you need to know

Jemima Kiss
Guardian journo / At every dot com event / Live-blogging away

Jennifer Ringley
Titian dormcaster / Was the first ever Cam Girl / Stooky Bill with tits

Jerry Yang
Trouble Yahoo! head / Somewhere there’s a Jerry Yin / Doing very well

Jonathan Brealey
Commandant of Host Europe / Recipient of hate mail / Was slightly my fault

Judith Clegg
Glasshouse co-founder / And Second Chance Tuesdayer / Quite the networker

Kajsa Leander
Ernst’s business partner / Co-founder of Boo.com / Hot one of the pair

Larry Page
Google co-founder / Abbott to Brin’s Costello / And Eric Schmidt’s bitch

Luke Johnson
Channel 4 chairman/ Used to deliver pizzas / In quite a big way

Maggie Richards
My Welsh ex-girlfriend / Occasional life-saver / Frequent soup maker

Mark Zuckerberg
Founder of Facebook / And world’s youngest billionaire / Wearer of flip-flops

Martin Clifford
uDate COO / His swimming pool board meetings / Inspired Robert Loch

Max and Duncan Jennings
The brothers Local / Although you wouldn’t know it / They’re from Newcastle

Michael Birch
Bebo co-founder / Provides popular platform / For vowel-less drivel

Michael O’Shea
Runs Wicked Uncle / Which always sounds to me like / Gift site for paedos

Michael Smith
Mind Candy founder / And Perplexcity quote thief / The ruffled-haired scamp

Mike Butcher
TechCrunch UK Ed / Technology journalist / And reformed bastard

Mike Godwin
Internet famous / Creator of Godwin’s law / Not Nazi himself

Neil Sean
Metro showbiz hack / The worlds most connected man / His sources tell me

Nic Brisbourne
VC at Espirit / Social media expert / Wearer of blue shirts

Nicholas Hellen
An absolute cunt / Really, a dreadful person / Google him for more

Nick Denton
Former print hack turned / Moon-headed Gawker founder / And friend of Fred Durst

Niklas Zennstrom
Co-founder of Skype / Not that unlike Janus Friis / Slightly more Swedish

Oli Barrett
Uber-networker / A former Butlin’s red coat / And doesn’t it show?

Paris Hilton
The hairless heiress / Jennican in nightvision / But sans modesty

Paul Birch
Red-trouser wearing / Bebo.com co-founder / brother of Michael

Peter Gabriel
Genesis front man / And We7 co-founder / Rock and rollovers

Peter Thiel
Paypal mafia don / Not the coolest of Mafias / It has to be said

Rebecca Lewis
RFW&N / Publicity manager / To the stars (and me)

Richard ‘Ricky’ Tahta
A shrewd investor / With an irritatingly / Good face memory

Richard Charkin
Book man who groks web / All publishing CEOs / Should be more like him

Richard Moross
They said print was dead / But Moo’s founding man in black / Would have none of it

Robert Loch
Tech party planner / Whose killer hot tub shindigs / Broke a celeb’s flat

Rupert Murdoch
Not fair, not balanced / The former Australian / Who owns TFP

Ruth Fowler
From Welsh Cambridge grad / To New York stripper blogger / Book deal no-brainer

Sam Lewis
Always first to know / Fellow new media whore / And bearer of news

Sara Lloyd
Head of digital / At Macmillan publishing / I owe her a lunch

Sarah Jessica Parker
A list superstar / But to me she’ll always be / Ferris Bueller’s wife

Saul Klein
Venture capitalist and coffee morning organiser

Savannah Christensen
Book dedicatee / Kudocities CEO / Oh, the list goes on

Sean Anderson
Responsible for / Billion-dollar typo / Quite the legacy

Sergey Brin
Google co-founder / As such plays Kuryakin / To Page’s Solo

Simon Trewin
Buying a book from / Bald-headed super-agent / May not be that cheap

Simon Woodroffe
A raw fish magnate / Turned television dragon / Turned Yotelier

Steve Chen
YouTube co-founder / Between him and Chad Hurley / I’m sick with envy

Steven Speilberg
Director of AI / Dumb film about smart robots / Unforgivable

Stooky Bill
World’s first talking head / The world’s biggest TV star / For fifteen seconds

Tim Ireland
Antipodean / MP blog vigilante / And rabble rouser

Tom Anderson
MySpace founder / And fake friend to the whole world / Lied about his age

Tom Boardman
Firebox co-founder / shot-glass chess grandmaster / Great fun at parties

Tom Watson MP
Labour minister / One of the few MPs who / Doesn’t hate the web

Walid Al Saqqaf
Local site founder / Ronaldo of babyfoot / Shame he’s also French

Xochi Birch
Bebo co-founder / Coolest first name in Web 2 / And wife of Michael

Ze Frank
Video blogger, knower of ugly MySpace / All-round Sports Racer

Zoe Margolis
Best-selling author / Formerly anonymous / One-track minded girl

…

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